Leglessbird Jokes

A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an
organization...

Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant, and noticed
that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.
It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and
utensils, I noticed he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked
around saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets.

When the waiter came back to serve our soup I asked, "Why the spoon?"

...

"Well," he explained, "the restaurants' owners hired McK & Co
Consulting to revamp all our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It
represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour.
If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips
back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he was able to replace it
with his spare.

"I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making
an extra trip to get it right now."

I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of
the waiter's fly. Looking around, I noticed that all the waiters had
the same string hanging from their flies. So before he walked off, I
asked the waiter, "Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string
right there?"

"Oh, certainly!" Then he lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so
observant."

"That consulting firm I mentioned also found out that we can save time
in the rest-room. By tying this string to the tip of 'you know what',
we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash
our hands, shortening the time spent in the rest-room by 76.39 percent."

"After you get it out, how do you put it back?"

"Well," he whispered, "I don't know about the others, but I use the
spoon."